I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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