I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize