Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
