You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
