don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Randomize
