people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
