I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
You were trust falling into bushes
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
