I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
NoShamevember. You game?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Randomize
