He disabled his match.com account in front of me
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
There's even glitter on my cock...
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