i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
