Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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