I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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