yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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