Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
