Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
