Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
