yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize
