garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
