Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
