So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
