there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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