I murdered the dance floor call the cops
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
