Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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