just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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