As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
