I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
So squirting runs in the family.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
