i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize