so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
