yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
