come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Shame - the story of my life.
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