Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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