she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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