Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
