yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize