Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Randomize