508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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