I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize