You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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