hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
