my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
