i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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