these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
