what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
