The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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