So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
