Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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