Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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