I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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