Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize