I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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